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Thursday, August 24, 2006
today was like totally AWESOME. japanese students came down to our school to watch us study and have experience. so it was like some of them came to our class and the first one i noticed was the one wearing braces and she was like...
UNBELIEVABLY CUTE AND IRRESISTABLE
ok so, i was so... woh, cute girl. so i was like writing in japanese (romanji version) in a note and i passed to CARMEN, so CARMEN was also like writing hers, haha.
so i wrote in another paper:
Ohayo gozaimasu! Watashi wa Fong Joel desu, hajimemashite. Anata no namae wa?
she was like so cute! and she replied with cute wordings:
My name is Yukina Nakagawa.
i go on and wrote:
I see, so where do you live?
so she wrote:
I lived in ********* (i forgot where she lived, ms koh threw that note away)
so i asked if she haf msn or email but she doesnt, haha. KAYA was like telling her sumthings, and i thought she told Yukina to ignore me or wad, so i wrote to her not to be scared of me like i gonna do sumthing bad to her, lol!!!

ok so i went for sci class and then to history. oh yea, before that, maths lesson miss koh saw me writing notes and i crushed the paper and said its rubbish. then she threw the paper away. after school, i went out and then forgot to take the paper with her address and then... aw.... i missed by sometime, and then someone emptied the dustbin.... = = WHO'S THAT IDIOT!!!!

aw...nvm, ling fei said that she's cute too wei yang oso haha. so i decided to learn JAP and noe more JAP gals, so cute!!! lol. aww.... so sad...

YUKINA!!! KAWAII!!!

with obsession,
joel

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
7:39 AM

Wednesday, August 23, 2006
today was great, like its too great for me to say "wow"...

-fuckin' theme
-okok lar, cuz i dun haf those bright coloured shirts = = what'd u want me ta do?
-so i was like only haf a blue shirt, a white jersey, some black and some dark blue that look like black and a brown-and-orange one
-patheticm u could say that = =
-cuz i only like dark colours like duh~

-so i was like so pissed off, it is supposed to be BE-YOURSELF DAY
-and we were like forced to wear those funny coloured shirts = =
-ok so i was like so fucked up and i really wanna slap mdm luan
-they told us to give ideas on the themes but they do not accept (the class committee's SOMEONE)
-and forced us to pay $2 to be forced by them to wear those fuckin' shirts of bright colours
-whew~ wad luck i had blue, a dull blue, its not bright blue so wad do u want me to do?
-WE SHOULD HAF OUR RIGHTS TO CHOOSE OUR CHOICE OF THEME INSTEAD OF THEM CHOOSING HELLO? 7 vs 29, WHO WINS? MAJORITY WINS HELLO? AND WE PAID OUR MONEY TOO, SO WE SHOULD HAVE OUR RIGHTS TO CHOOSE THE THEME, LIKE DUH~ = = SHIT U GUYS!
-^^ i am calm
-but the fact is that i am lying =P

anyway, i am gonna bring extra two clothes, one for dancing our mass hip-hop dance(choreographed by me and mary ^^) and the other for me going back p-school and play arcade one ^^

oh yea, today i choreographed with mary the dance and woh, it went successful. but its fast so u guys, watch out! ^^ oh yea, saw break dancers there dancing, nice. gd job u guys out there! dance out ur life!!! hmm... the mass dance are supposed to be in groups and each group haf to be at least with a pair of partners, and then me and mary will judge their dances after we taught them and the winner will get a special price *not cheap though*

dance out ur life with vigour,
joel^^

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
7:54 AM

Monday, August 21, 2006
heh heh... dun wish to tok crap too much

-came to school
-Brandon Chai said my hair look nicer (thanks! ^^)
-oh shit, forgot to bring maths 1
-bought from valerie for $1 (double the price)
-oh man, ms koh came in and then say do project
-nvr use maths 1 lo! so angry...
-recess! ate too much, forgot must save money
-got art, nvr bring, nvr do summore =P
-science, nvr bring materials, sad
-discussing with yanni project
-sian diao... chinese, we go late on purpose then say is we do experiment do so late =P she so stupid to believe us
-school over, muz stay back, but lie to cher that my por por go hospital (aww sorry por! ='()

-went back hme
-got $20 from mum to buy sci materials and stupid chinese assessment = =
-went to buy sci materials from IMM jurong east
-went to popular but no chinese assessment
-went back to IMM to buy more materials
-took a shuttle bus that made me wait so damn long, fucking shit!
-went to JP popular
-bought assessment
-checked the straight perm of hair from the salon
-$109.90 reasonable ^^
-thinking of telling shiyong tml haha

shiyong sure not enuf money one. haha. oh yea, can ask mum lo haha for the money to straight perming of hair, she allows me. but since she working so hard, i saved $26 already then nid to save more then she no nid pay so much for my hair lo. ^^ me gd boi (actually, no)

ok so juz now shiying told me that mdm luan said that WE SHOULD WEAR SHIRTS WITH CARTOONS IMPRINTED DURING B-URSELF DAY, OMG MAN! but i dun haf only got black, orange and brown, brown, dark blue, blue de shirts. pants only black and brown and white lol.

looking forward for the STRAIGHT PERM yay! ^^

joel,
simply shitty

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
5:38 AM

Wednesday, August 16, 2006
wa kau! today my FUNKY HAIR kana forced by MRS FIONA LEE to go down. =( i was making funky hair!!! and then my hair so not nice = =.

funky funky funky = =

ha... today shiying say that can wear own clothes during BE-YOURSELF DAY oso on TEACHER'S DAY, so song!! weee~ i wearing the coat then zip up to chest lvl, shiok right? very sexy sia! anyway, i wearing short pants, not jeans. if i wear jeans, i would be so hot. hahaha, i could wear own clothes!!! yay! shiyong wearing low cut v-neck leh! ILENA CHECK HIM OUT THAT DAY OK? lols, jkjk. he will sure to be sexy and hot that day, haha plus he cute and shuai summore = =

wonder wad joshua from 1b2 will be wearing, wonder wad ling fei will be wearing, wonder wad shang jun will be wearing, wonder wad MARY WILL BE WEARING. HOPE NOT ''THE HOLY'', haha. i put it as "holy" cuz she wad she wore today in lit was so "HOLEY". haha, wondering wad every one will wear....

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
4:44 AM

Monday, August 14, 2006
LIFE FUCKED UP
man, mum distrust me. kanasai lar! ok so this was what happened today:
-came back home from school
-mum asked me about my results for the test
-i said i dunno haven give out yet, only noe chinese
-she asked for chinese results
-i said 58/100
-SCREAMS AND SHOUTS
-NAGGING
-she thought i lied to her about my test
-she thought that i noe all the test results but dun wanna tell me
-so she called GRACE LIM
-GRACE told her that dunno the tests yet and all tested le
-she then said 'ok fine, i'll let u off this time' to me

WTF! she dun even trust her own son! like duh~ ch! nvm, she wont ever trust me. cuz she dun trust me, i cant trust her. ok so i cant trust anyone in the world anyway... except for some people... my meis except one of them, my darling ^^, shiyong bla and bla...

mum thought i was in gang and... WTF?! she doesnt even understands me and even say i was in a gang! hello?! I--WONT----JOIN-------GANG!!! nvm, anyway, everything is my fault, my bad. ok?! FINE?! MY FAULT! MY BAD! think she thought i join gang cuz my hair, attitude, my clothings (cuz i last time went out wif mary and wore a jacket with the zip, the zip was zipped to my chest and i wore a necklace so very the gang gang type) but hello?! it is wad century now???!!! and oso, after i came home wearing dat, i feel pain on my stomach and chest de in between, cuz its a day after napfa then v pain. then she tot i fight wif other pple. wth la

anyway, she distrust me for alot of things, too many.... hai... nvm nvm... got time then i say... hai... simply sadistic everyday...

y am i so crazy, y am i so mad, y am i so happy when i feel so sad? y am i in this world when everyone dun care, y am i right here when i'm not so rare? hai....

oh yea... my body is so out of control!!!! today was running 2.4. i ran until have way, my fingers were like so stuck and i cant move them for a round!!! wtf... haiz... my legs oso after i lie down i wanna come up oso v diff to... wadeva la...

='(

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
1:51 AM

Friday, August 04, 2006
aw... shit me. ok, so last night mum was like NO WAY I AM GONNA LET U GO TO DANCE HIP-HOP. i was like, what? can u give me any reason? but she said, NO MEANS NO, GO STUDY HARD, DUN THINK ABOUT THIS WU LIAO STUFF. shit her lar, i was so pissed n hurt n i ran into my room. fuckin' dad was using the com, so damn noisy. didnt noticed i shed a tear, freak lar... ok, so mum kept opening the door to check on me, but i was all along underneath my blanket and she cant see what i am doing. and the door goes opening and closing so i supposed mum was checking on me. whatever~ anyway, before that mum shouted at me, WHAT FRIEND IS THAT TO TELL YOU TO TRY FOR THE DANCE CREW, U GIVE ME THE NAME AND THE HANDPHONE NUMBER, I WILL GO CALL AND SCOLD THE FRIEND OF YOURS! shit her lar, i think she tot that i was joining the bad company. she said that that friend was trying to make my results drop = = its fiona, hello~? duh, fiona is a good senior from express stream de ok?! she wont do that de... think i trust frens more than my family... haiz...

ok so today i was completely ignoring mum. mum was like making decision for my everything! i woke up in the morning and went to bath. i took my jersey and mum said, why u wear that? go outdoors than wear ma... i said jersey can be worn at home mum... she said, but its new dun wear lar. then i did not wear that jersey = = then coming to lunch she asked if i wanna eat laksa and she will cook, i said no, there's leftover chicken yesterday, i'll eat that. she said she wants that for dinner as an additional dish = = then i said, i want maggie mee, she said maggie mee u eat when no one in the house lar... i was like, ok lar! wadeva u wanna cook, i eat, ok?! walau... making decision for me lor = =

ok so i was like completely ignoring her when i was eating. she kept talking about that i better focus on my studies cuz when she was young she was poor and so she had no money to study. she studied till P6 and went to work and yada yada yada yada... ... ... ok so she was like, fine, whatever i say i dont think u will wanna listen now, but i really hope u will remember it... cuz i was completely ignoring what's she's saying and was like very sad or wadeva. I DUN CARE cuz she doesnt even understand me, she doesnt even know wad i wanna do. she obviously dont care about my feelings so why should i care about her feelings?

shit me, ok so i was like wanna play alot of great songs for music project but the score sheet is too diff for me so i dun wanna do it.




today was a fuck



joel,
depressed & ignoring ='(

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
11:55 PM

Thursday, August 03, 2006
oh dang... i really hates it when mum and dad dun understands me. wth wth wth. that's all i can say... what's wrong with hip-hop?! its just a dance, a dance is to be enjoyed like a pastime and appreciated as an art! like dur.. i really am breaking down... wadeva. i really feel like breaking down. can i have it my choice for this time...? pls i really want that. i feel like crying even though i am a guy... whatever i wanna do, u just dont appreciates it. i make it the best not to be unhappy but.. i really cant take it... u guys just acts like a wet blanket everytime i wanna do something that i really really wanan do. ='( i really wanna cry and rave and scream and... haiz... i really really wanna have my choice, my own views. i really wan you guys to just give advice and supports me when i needed u guys to...

ok, was searching for hiphop videos when mum says, "this is hiphop?! so lame! focus on your studies la! u bcome a dancer oso no future" dad continued, "heard that? go study on ur books lar, search for this wu liao stuff for wad?"

i was really hurt and rejected, i... haiz...i just wanna break down. i am really tired of these words u kept pourin on me, all this rot about ur disagreement with my actions, all this things that u stopped me when i really really wanted... i really wanted ur support... i really wanna break down... i really wanna cry... i am really very tired, i wanna stop. i wanna give up. haiz... ='(

i really wanted to dance mum, i really wanted to.. i know you are concerned about my future but, a dance is like a pastime, a hobby... really, can i have my own choice? i know that u are very concerned about me but, i really wanna do the things i like... perhaps its the generation gap... i am not blaming you but, i really wish that you could at least let me make my own choice... i... shit... did i dropped a tear? yes i did... ='(

oh yea, today i accidently left yilin's book in 2d1's classroom.. aww... i am so sorry, like dang, i just argh... i feel so guilty of that... sry YILIN. aw... and the sci project i kept slacking, sorry YANNI. its my fault lar, sorry =( oh and mary's present haven give yet, sorry MARY... SIN YEE, sorry about sayin u dun look gd on those clothes, actually u do. except for the perjamas one. u look gd in only the white one, sorry =( oh sorry SAMUEL, nvr tok to you just now, sorry... sorry EVERYBODY , cuz i suk... ='(


alright, put on a fake smile go to class.... =)
^^ jiayo oh joel! u could take all the blame de, you could do it! i noe u can, u can take all the troubles without saying to other pple de. u can take it, u wont fall, cuz i noe u wont! ^^





sad guy,
joel




simply rottin' ='(

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
6:54 AM

Wednesday, August 02, 2006
i wanna try out Revo-tia. but mum just said NO. NO. NO! fuck lar. should i leave it like this?
no i cant. she said that we are very bao shou then we dont dance. = = so lame lar. i say people got primary school go dance wad. i pri school oso got dance lor = = and then summore, she say cuz the parents want them to do so = = so lame la, mostly is that children wants to do it, parents will give advices instead of just blowing it up with a strict NO, NO or NO. they should support their children de ma. anyway, if they dun wish me to do that, they should at least let me try, gimme a chance to prove them, right?

oh man, they just wont listen and budge. guess wad?

PARENTS ARE THE OBSTUCTION OF CHILDREN'S HAPPINESS. IT'S THE SAME EVERYTIME.

great just great. i really really wanna shout out:
CANT YOU JUST LISTEN TO ME TALK? ITS TIME FOR ME TO MAKE MY DECISION AND YOU JUST LISTEN AND GIVE ADVICES! YOU MAKE ME FEEL SO DEPRESSED EVERYTIME YOU TALK. YOU MAKE ME ANGRY EVERYTIME YOU TALK. YOU MAKE ME FALL EVERYTIME YOU TALK THAT FUCKING ROT!!! CANT YOU JUST LISTEN TO ME TALK???!!! YOU DONT KNOW WHEN TO KEEP QUIET, WHEN TO SUPPORT YOUR CHILD WHEN HE NEEDS HELP, WHEN TO HELP HIM UP, WHEN HE NEEDS YOUR CARE, WHEN HE NEEDS EVERYTHING!!! SO WHAT RIGHT DO YOU SERVE AS A PARENT?! ok giving money to me, that counts as what a parent does but most importantly, i need your ATTENTION... can you just give me those that i badly need? you just shut every conversation that i wanna say with a NO NO NO!!! I BADLY NEED ATTENTION!!!

it goes the same for all the conversation, not only this dance thingy. same goes to my dad. he shuts me up everytime. he dun know what i want and need. = = i really wanna burst. i wanna SMOKE, DRINK, KILL and become a GANGSTER!!! oh pls, just gimme some attention... i really need the attention... i dont wanna ROT WHEN I AM NOW DEAD... oh yea, i died in 5th July 2006. pls??? gimme those thing i wanted since i was neglected...

i really have nth to say. whats the use of living in this world when this world dont even care?! ok, frens may care but parents do not. its the same as an empty world.

i really wanna ROT now...

=(=( =(=(
=(=( =(=(
=(=( =(=(
=(=( =(=(
=(=( =(=(

joel

simply rotting

ano hi no boku wa mukizu na mamade hito wo aisouto shiteita
that day, i love you without getting hurt/
7:31 AM

profile
RYU fong
Singapore
15/07/92
CTSS - 3B1 '07
Natural hair colour: Brownish red (so what if its brown?)
Status: -single but STILL crushing

random insanity. GLAMAZON...not!

randomly.insane.

the loves

" 2C1 '06, 3B1 '07
" CTSS sec1 camp facilitators '07
" 1D1 '07
" ex-workmates
" Library Group
" 6-6 '04
" mum, dad & sisters
" my mei's, girlfriends, nu ren, lao por
" my darlings and dears
" SHOPPING!!
" all those friends whom i know, and always keep contacts with me =DDDD

exits to light

!my profile!
Amanda Wong =)
BENedict
Carmen =D
ChunMing =D
Chong Han =D
CHRISTINE CHUA!! =DDD
Denise =)
ElizabethCamilia =D
Eugene =)
Fionn =D
FYT =D
Grace.L. =)
GoiLing
GweeJie =D
Isabell(a) =)
iRiS =)
Jane =D
Jamie
Jeff =)
Jeremy =D
JiaLing =D
JiaYan
Jeric~ =)
KaiXin =)
Kristel =D
Kiwi =D
Liyana =)
LiPing =D
LiSze =)
Maisie =)
MingQian =D
PeiXuan =D
PeiLing =)
Rachelle =)
RAIN =D
Ruby =D
Serene Tan =)
Tammy =)
Tricia =)
WEILIN =D
WeiZheng =)
XueYao =D
Yanni =)
Yvonne =D
YiLin =D
YanWah
YinHui =D
YunTing
ZhenNing =)

credits
image : hiddenmemoryx
lyrics : It Ends Tonight/ AAR

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain

memories
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007